Digging OUT Darkness...

Dear Nothin Within...

2011-02-08T00:55:00.000-08:00

Dear nothing within ... it has been so long we had a talk, i don't know where to start... First thing first, my apology for not writing you for so long. Indeed you have all the rights to kick my butt. See my guts ,How can i dare to keep you waited for a post for such a long time? But my dear friend so many good things are happening here that i hardly get time to make a note about how lazy i am becoming day by day. Yeah yeah i know i know now you will start with what a sleepy lazy bum i used to be in college time and how i hated the mornings like anything. Surprisingly mornings are not so bad any more. Now that i have this cute little chubby piece of mine sleeping next to me as i open my eyes in the morning. somehow its just so refreshing!

I know you would say if i get up early and don't even work now a days what the hell i do the whole day. It's not as simple as you believe it is, miss nothin within. at least not when you have the cutest baby in the world. Who just smiles and look into your eyes.. like you mean the world to him. You wont understand how hard it is not to look at his divine face while he is napping. Overwhelmed is the word. But there is nothing wrong going crazy about how adorable is my little master.and even if is i am an exception :P. Sorry i can't finish a blog without a smiley you know me ;).

But sometimes i really miss how close we used to be at one time. I had had shared almost every secret,joy and concern with you at a time and you were always there for me. In-fact you did more than what i expect from you. You gave me the confidence that i could be loved through my writing.I might have been just a mundane poet and a sloppy writer but you always encouraged me to be what i wanted to be. So much happened so fast that i never got a chance to look back and thank for everything what nothin within has given me in all these time. so many good friends,believers and of course people who have shown faith in me and what i do.

But before i could see that we are ripping apart it hit me. Yes yes the same thing i was most afraid of. One fine day in this big world i suddenly found the one person who became everything to me. Afraid to confess that i finally got him, i'd just shut my eyes to my sweetest dream, i convinced myself that it is just an illusion. But how long one can resist what one desperately wants, lastly i opened my eyes to see that the dream was all real and it was all mine. I did give you a hint about this. didn't i? well you know me it had never been easy for me to tell things straight away. after all i am a writer i know how to weave things ;). but there was one more reason for hiding it from you, i was afraid that things will never going to be the same between us anymore. My friend it happens when you meet the one who can solve all your problems, who never get bored listening to your non sense, a great critic, a believer and who trust you for his life and most importantly who gives you all the freedom in life. And when you get that you will not go anywhere, because you know you can go anywhere you want. It sounds so weirdly insane but this is what it really is. My whole life i fought for my rights, my space, my beliefs, my reputation, my identity but the more i fought for it the more i became the person what others thought i cant be not the one i wanted to be. With him i found so much freedom that i understood i wasn't running behind freedom all my life i was running in the search of boundaries. I wanted to limit myself to want i am and not searching for what else i could be. Focusing on doing what i always thought i would do some day. Spending some time in just my world, away from people who expect me to be want they want me to be, just living my life in a leisure, doing the things i love. Sharing the life with the most wonderful husband in the world, raising the cutest baby, writing the book i always wanted to write, learning things, snoozing in a cozy comforter on a chilly day yawn yawn!! :) living every moment of the life like it has been made only for me.

Believe me i might be a different person now but certainly not for you. see i am still keeping you posted about everything ... like i always used to ;).

Love

Your's Beloved Blogger.

2010-11-25T23:03:00.000-08:00

2010-04-13T17:48:00.000-07:00

Khoi hai ek parachayi jo mere sang sang chala karti thi

Khoi hai ek nishani si wo jo har moud par mila karti thi

Kuch rang thi wo, kuch roshani si, bas sath raha karti thi

Khoi hai ek khanak hansi, jo meri aawaz main hua karti thi

Khoi hai ek natakhat si pari, kahi mujhame basaa karti thi

Masoom si thi wo, kuch shaitan si, bas yu hi rup badalati thi

Khoi hai aankho ki wo chamak, jisame dunia dikha karti thi

Khoi hai bheetar ki rohsani, andhero main jo raah batati thi

Suraj si kabhi ek jyot si, ek aag thi jo man main jalaa karti thi

Khoi hai gam ki chahat, kabhi sadaa seene main basa karti thi

Khoi hai khudase roothi raatein, aksar shikayato main beeta karti thi

Khafa rahte the khudase, phir bhi dil main ek tasalli si rahti thi

Khoi hai jaan.. jism ko choad tanha, har saans usko jaise chubha karti thi

Khoi hai khudpe gumaan karne ki chahat, apani hasti hi jaise apani naa thi

Naa jaane koun likh betha ye lafaz kagaz pe, meri ruh to abhi jaagi naa thi

2009-06-17T07:38:00.000-07:00

Waqt ne aisi pheri ungliya gili ret par

har lahar ke sath mera Naksh badlata raha

Komal kabhi, kabhi malin kutil sa kahi

Kadam kadam par naya saya mujhe milta raha

Ek shikhar, ek kann hun ya thokaro ki dhul mein

Nit nayi pahchaan se hi man mera ladta raha

Saaf ukarin tasviron se mil raha sagar kuch yun

Aks mera hole hole maati main khota raha

Dhun main apni madmast tha kuch yu samaa

Chode bina nishaniya meri bas aage badta chala

Bas aage badta chala

2009-04-01T03:48:00.000-07:00

Baadlo main jane kaise chup gayi thi chandani

Tare the jo raat bhar ye aasma damka rahe

Har lahar ke sang maano dubati ho roshani

Thik usi pal ek aur katra bulbule le aa rahe

Thodi jo gharayi raat ye bhi natkhat ho chala

Goud main soyi roshani se atkheli karta phire

Har machalati dhaar ko chooti hai kuch yu pawan

Thande pade saagar main ek chingaari sulgaati chale

Koi batalaye to zara poochkar isase mujhe

Kis nashe main raat bhar ye be-khouf lahlahati rahe

Shabnamo ki barisho se bhigta rahe daaman yunhi

Har lahar ki raagini bas kano main gungunati rahe

Atak jaye kahin palanko ke beach main hi ye samaa

Aankh khule jab bhi, in palon ki yaad mahakati rahe

Nishaan

2008-11-03T06:34:00.000-08:00

Kaha Chod aanyi chanchanati payal wo..

Ab Dabe paanv Chalati hai zindagi

Dishaao se puchaa karti thi pata

Binaa sahil ke nishaan badati hai zindagi

Churati thi rang nazaron se sitaron se

Kiranoo ke kisi jhurmuth main gum hone lagi hai zindagi

Duboyi thi ungliyaan jis Chahat ki rangat main

Us khushaboo ki mahak khone lagi hai zindagi

Pichali barish main janha giri thi kuch bunde

Usi sukhe kue main jivan ki aas talashati hai zindagi..

Zindagi.... Ek Saans

2008-09-28T05:55:00.000-07:00

Zindagi....ek saans ek aas

Dhundhale ho rahe hai jo is nisha raston ke manzilon ke
Thamkar Palbhar ek nazar ji bhar dekh lene do...

Soone sa damka rahi hai jo is kore paani ko
Ek ghunt us roshani ka pi lene do...

Machalati hai jo halchal karti in leharon main
Bas ek lamha us aawaraa masti main ji lene do...

Khamosh patthar baatain karate hai jis tarah ek duje se
Unhi bolati khamoshiyon main guftugu karane do...

Hatho main bharkar dhoop liye ja rahi jo saanjh
Ek mutthi un kataron se roshan janha kar lene do...

Kya jaane kab ruk jaaye in saanson ka karawaa
Thamkar hath is pal ka ek saans main zindagi ji lene do ...

Is ek saans main puri rukakar zindagi ji lene do

Aawargi

2008-06-03T06:21:00.000-07:00

Aawargi ke nashe main chur chale hai rahoo par

Suni galiyon ko roshan kiye ja rahe hai

Jo khali khali kona daba hai seene main

Usake band darwajoo pe dastak diye ja rahe hai

Khawaishe Dafnaye rakhi thi jo barason se

Un par padi padi mitti ko halke kiye ja rahe hai

Aane ko hai wo mousam baharon ka najaroon ka

Esi chahat main ujaad din khul ke jiye ja rahe hai

Samjhe nahi tohafe main gam mila ya khushi

Bas har lamhe ko daman main liye ja rahe hai

Aawargi ke nashe main chur chale hai rahoo par

Suni galiyon ko roshan kiye ja rahe hai

Ulajhan..

2008-04-18T22:05:00.000-07:00

Ulajhi Padi hai jo gutthiya zindagi ki

Mann Karta hai uski har ek gaanth khol doon,

Palkon kee aut se jhankataa hai roshni ka tukada, Jo koi

Band aankho ke darawaze unke liye khol doon,

Begaani si dhun jo khanakati hai hardam kanoo main

Sajaakar suroon se use, bana koi geet anamol doon,

Bujhi bujhi gumsum si hai jo saanjh ki dehri

Natkhat chandani usaki paidhi par dhol doon,

Bhataki hai jo khushi talash main rastoon ki manziloon ki

Hath tham kar usko raahon par moud doon,

Ulajhi Padi hai jo gutthiya zindagi ki

Mann Karta hai uski har ek gaanth khol doon,

2008-03-21T00:40:00.000-07:00

Wahi safar wahi kanrawa, bilkul wahi hai ranhe bhi

Phir kyo manzil kanhi gumshuda ho gayi hai

Wahi chand wahi chandani, taaron ne bikhari hai wahi roshani

Phir ye rat kyo khamosh chupchap so gayi hai

Wahi nazaare wahi diwarain, mahakti hai wahi khushboo ab bhi

Phir kyo fiza se sadagi khafa ho gayi hai

Wahi dhoop wahi roshani, pairon tale ki zamin hai wahi

Phir kyo apani parchayi ajanabi ho gayi hai

Wahi jism wahi jaan , wahi rooh hai ham ab bhi

Phir kyo jane ye zindagi juda ho gayi hai

Wahi mukaan hai ye wo shayad jo khawaboo me tha

Phir kyo ise pane ki khushi dhundali ho gayi hai

Wahi thama hai kal wahi hai hamara aaj bhi

Shayad ham hi hai jo waqt se aage bad gaye hai

2007-11-17T03:15:00.000-08:00

No need to zoom in ur lences just click on the image below trust me its readable ;)

Roshani

2007-08-08T01:55:00.000-07:00

Daaman naa chodenge doobate suraj ka
Apane kandhe par khe layenge usaki sawari
Par roshani ko doobane naa denge

Andhiyara chahe niglane ko ho chand
Hatho me tare liye rakhenge puri taiyari
Par roshani ko doobane naa denge

Kitani bhi katil ho chale hanwaye
Seena tane karenge lou ki paharedari
Par roshani ko doobane naa denge

Nilane lage kaalima ujaas jab antar ka
Himmat ke dam par phir jagayenge ujiyari
Par roshani ko doobane naa denge
HAM roshani ko doobane naa denge

Meri Nishaniya..

2007-07-15T02:58:00.000-07:00

Karodo ki bhid me khojati hoo khudako

To kuch nishaniya sujha deti hoon

Tez hawao ka rukh modana lagta hai jab mushkil

Panchi ko dekh sanhas jaga leti hoon

Darti hai jab bhi aankhe band hone se

Chupake se ek naya sapana saza leti hoon

Ufanati hai nadi jab aankho se bahane ko

Ek bar phir halke se muskara leti hoon

Har ke war se hathash ho jati ho jab bhi

Nayi Koshish ka ek deep jala leti hoon

Karodo ki bhid me khudko khojati hoon jab

To kuch nishaniya sujha deti hoon

Jab Ham ..

2007-07-04T06:27:00.000-07:00

Bejaan diwaroo se batiyate hai

Aur Taswiro ko hakikat banate hai